March?

Can you believe today’s date? We are already starting the third month of the year. This blows my mind that so much time has passed in 2015.

I am currently suffering from whatever my relatives had over last weekend because I have that horrible combination of fever+flu+sore throat+cough. It has been five days. I am so tired and irritated right now, I just want to take a week off and go home. Being sick away from people who would care about you is the absolute worst.

Due to the usual side effects of having said combo of symptoms, I am lagging behind all school work because I spend most of my time sleeping, or failing at attempts to do work. Having really, really, really bad Internet service is not helping. I have no idea why Johor Bahru has such a bad track record for the Internet! Even Kota Kinabalu has a more reliable service. What is wrong with this state?

I should really stop complaining so much. But I’m sick, so I’m allowed to. Hah. Cross your fingers and pray that I get well soon. I really really really really hate this.

Sunday blues

I spent the weekend back in Kota Kinabalu (After 21 years. I think the last time I was there, it was in transit to Tawau. I was born in KK and lived there for the first year of my life. I have no memory of it) for my Lola’s birthday and it was good.

I was the oldest cousin to be present in my mom’s nuclear family: sure, I had cousins from the extended side but I was the oldest of the four of us who were there. As usual, I was on part-babysitter duty, but I didn’t mind, especially since the kids have grown up significantly.

It was good to be with family, family that wanted you there. They gave me space to do my reading for class, and surprisingly didn’t make me feel too bad about it. I did spend time with them, don’t get me wrong. I finally stepped in sea water for the first time in my life, brief though it was.

It was good but we all have to return to reality. I came back home to palpable tensions because of some petty thing my dad was upset about. For the first time, he didn’t send me to the airport. I’ll admit, that stung, a heck of a lot. I flew off back to Johor Bahru, where I am right now, on Sunday night to find myself missing a book and accidentally breaking my fan’s plug. I managed to get that fix today, and my mom is sending the book via express post, but yesterday I was on the verge of tears.

I know, I know, I was being ridiculous but it did feel bad. Being back in class today was alright, thankfully. I am pretty glad I got to clerk a patient properly and get a few things signed. It was good feeling.

I have tomorrow morning free, so to speak, so I’m going to get some reading done. I hope that my mind can reset itself back into the groove of things. Have a good week ahead, lovelies. x

“I feel just so.”

I hitched a ride with a friend back up to Subang Jaya on Tuesday afternoon. I stayed home for 48 hours. This morning I took a flight to Kota Kinabalu for my grandmother’s birthday celebration. I spending time here till Sunday morning. I will be flying back to Johor Bahru on Sunday evening.

Needless to say, I am quite exhausted. Or I will be a whole lot more exhausted.

I know this is going to sound terrible but what I basically did on Tuesday night (literally the minute I came back), Wednesday was help do all the work in the house that my mother wasn’t able to do because of work. Thursday was a bit more relaxing, thankfully.

I try to remind myself that I should be grateful for what I have, and I am. Not everyone can come home to their family during a break. I may not be close to my relatives, but I would probably regret it if I didn’t. Family comes first with me, so I have to bear the ‘awkward’.

It’s kinda sad that I am still studying while I’m in KK. It looks rude but there isn’t much of an option when you’re in medical school.. and pretty crap at a lot of things.

I am tired. I would have loved a longer break. And at the same time, it’s thrown me off from my routine.

This post has been a rambling of nothing. I wish I could put what I feel into words properly. Maybe tonight.

Week in Review

Let’s go with how Week 1 went for me. Clearly, I did not blog on Wednesday or Friday (though I do have a few things in the draft, it didn’t feel right to schedule them at the present moment). While I could just ‘let it go’ and not blog, I made promise to myself that I would at least try to find a balance of things, and here is me trying.

I moved back here last Sunday and I wish I could say that I’ve gotten back into the groove of things but that’s not true. It’s never ‘good’. It’s always a challenge. And the worst part is that I got switched to a different subgroup. That sucks when you’re already ‘in tune’ with other people and they’re still together, but you have to adapt to something new. Nonetheless, it’s a challenge I have to deal with for the next year. I hope so survive this.

Psychiatry in Week One is purely introduction and though we had a class quiz yesterday, I’ve kinda impressed myself with how much of this I really enjoy and understand. I have always liked understanding ‘the mind’ and learning the theory is great.. but I’m pretty apprehensive about actually interviewing a real ‘psychiatric patient’ on Monday. I already need to interview one properly and present a case in class on Tuesday. I am feeling a little overwhelmed and we’re barely ‘in it’ yet.

I hope I can cope with everything and not screw this up too much. Wish me luck, guys.

my week in objects (and stuff)

The last week at home was good and I’ll admit that the fact that I’m going back after 8/9 days (CNY break) makes being away not too bad.

1. Trip to MUJI6  4 3 2

Yes, this is the first time I’ve been to MUJI after hearing lots of people rave about it. As much as I would have loved to buy a whole bunch of things, I settled for 3 pens:72. Orange juice at Antipodean

Untitled1The last breakfast with Aaron during my ‘last week’ at home.

3. Aaron’s mojito from family dinner Chillis 9I took a sip. I do not like it. hah.

4. Ishihara Colour Blindness Test plate10Part of the health check-ups my parents did was an eye test. As much as I know I’m not colour blind, I always get a bit tiny bit nervous when looking at these plates, “just in case”

5. Dinner at Morganfields

13 12 11

The ribs here were excellent. I was too busy eating to take a photo, haha.

6. From the Keri Smith postcard set8This was sent to a certain best friend. Let’s see where this goes, Rae Wae!

I am back in JB, the room has been set up and tomorrow is orientation. Back to ‘reality’.

Thoughts in the car

I am in the car on the way back to JB as I type this. Yes, I am that person who uses a laptop in the midst of traveling. I am not driving, so it’s not like this is wholly inappropriate.

I start class in less than 48 hours from now. That thought is pretty terrifying. While the first day is purely ‘introductions’, it’s proper classes from Tuesday onwards. We are suppose to hit the ground running with tests already prescheduled. My first rotation this year is psychiatry. I kinda want to do well in that, especially with my strong family history of psychiatric problems (ha ha). Though I am still in ‘holiday mood’ as people would call it, I genuinely want to start classes properly and do better in 2015.

I have made a bunch of mistakes in 2014 in terms of my education, which is why starting from Monday, it’s going to be the actual trial of how much blogging I can keep up. I do want to take out time for me to write down my thoughts, but we’ll have to see.

Fingers crossed that things go better in Year 4. I do not want to be a lousy doctor; people deserve to get the best possible treatment, therefore making it necessary for me to obtain as much knowledge as possible. Like I said on Wednesday, actions speak so much louder than words, so tomorrow is going to be my ‘schedule-everything and plan’ day.

I am almost a doctor. This is scary as frick.

Five Books I Highly Recommend

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I always thought I could be a librarian. Or Kathleen Kelly from You’ve Got Mail. But Life handed me a different deck of cards, but that does not mean I do not adore books. As the title clearly states, here are Five Books I highly recommend to anyone for Five Friday. (I’m trying to keep it as ‘neutral’ as possible because there are books that are targeted to a certain demographic, be it gender or age, so hopefully anyone can look these up and enjoy them)

Also, I have linked Book Depository pages for each title, so it’ll be easier if you want to buy them. They provide free shipping internationally (which is the best thing ever) and reasonable discounts on a lot of books. If you’re Malaysian, try MPHOnline; they may or may not have some of the books in stock but there’s free shipping for purchases over RM50 (plus, you can actually track your parcel!).

1. Boy by Roald Dahl

The first time I read this, I was 8 or 9 years old because it was a compulsory read for my brother’s Form 1 class (yes, he skipped 2 grades because he’s smart and all). I didn’t appreciate it as much as I did when I reread it at 11. I love this book. I want to be able to write a book like this. If you are shockingly unfamiliar with Roald Dahl, he’s a famous children’s book author (he wrote a few adult-ish books, too) with the likes of ‘The Witches’, ‘BFG’ and ‘Charlie and the Chocolate Factory’. ‘Boy’ however, is autobiographical in nature and such an adventurous book. There is a difference between reading fiction and non-fiction, but with Roald Dahl, his life story reads like a good novel that he wrote. It’s full of lively characters, rich insight into the mind of a child-to-semi-adult. It’s also filled with pictures of him as a kid, letters he wrote to his mother and really funny illustrations. A definite must-read if you’re a Dahl fan.

2. The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky

If you only know this story based on the movie, you’re probably missing out on a few things. As much as Stephen Chbosky tried to condense his book into a script, the movie did not flesh out the characters to the depth of what they were on the page. I really like the movie, don’t get me wrong, even if Emma Watson’s American accent wasn’t fantastic (she tried her best, points to her for that. And she was very passionate about the book, which I will always admire), but the book was what made me want to watch it in the first place. Perks is about Charlie, and is written is a letter form to the reader. He addresses each chapter with ‘Dear Friend’ and it’s as though he is writing to you, the reader. Charlie is what the title states: a wallflower, but as a person, he has gone through a lot of heavy stuff that most of us are lucky to never have come across. But this book is not solely about him: it deals with eating disorders, sexuality, confusion in being a teenager, mistakes we all make, and depression. I got chills reading certain parts of the book because I felt a connection to what I read. I think this book is one that every teenager/young adult should read because there is so much that you can gain from it. I may be gushing, but this is one of my favourite books.

3. And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie

If you like mystery novels, this one will be a hit with you. I am a fan of detective stories, Hercule Poirot is my favourite of all time, but this book is not a Poirot tale. The brilliant Agatha Christie weaves a complicated tale that brings strangers to a island, invited by a mysterious person only to have a murder occur. The guests panic and try to figure it out, while a creepy poem haunts them at every turn. (I swear, typing my own version of a summary just gave me chills) I read this book at night: BIG mistake. I freaked out in my own room. And it’s not a scary book, but a definite page turner. The ending is amazing and shocking, which is why this book is known to be her best.

4. Captain Courageous by Rudyard Kipling

This book is one of my favourites from childhood. I think my mom bought it for my brother and I, but I think I favour it more. I can definitely reread this at anytime. This book is about a young, prick of a boy named Harvey Cheyne Jr. who gets thrown overboard on a trip only to be picked up by a fishing boat called “We’re Here”. No one believes his story of being a rich kid and he ends up working on the ship as deckhand under the careful watch of it’s captain, Disko Troop. This is a coming of age story, where a stuck-up brat learns to appreciate what he has and find purpose in the world. I think I learned a lot of names of fishes, proper fishermen’s tales and a good dose of learning to be humble from this book. It has a good ending that will make you smile.

5. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger

This book is loved by a lot of people and for good reason. I first read this when I was 18, I think; a little late in the game but I think it was good to read at 18 because I kinda understood Holden Caulfield better. If you don’t know what this book is about, it’s the story of Holden Caulfield, an angst ridden schoolboy who gets kicked out of boarding school, and checks himself into hotel before he returns home. You can imagine what a young boy gets up to, alone and ‘free’ to do whatever he chooses. I found his views of people he met very interesting, and the way he perceived relationships, especially with his own family was relatable in some sense. Holden is not the best role model but reading his story was nonetheless enjoyable.

So, here are my 5 books that I would recommend to anyone. Are there any of yours in these five or do you have five of your own to send back to me? Comment or tweet me. x